Movies You Should Never See - Highlander: The Source

Posted on August 6th, 2008 by Jeremy.
Categories: Blog.

OHHHHHH Man.

You guys that regularly check my site, follow my twitters or watch my YouTubes know that I’m pretty much a geek beyond geek. Sure I have a fundamental lack of knowledge and experience when it comes to Video Games, but for the most part I’m pretty well rounded when it comes to Geekology.

So when I tell you that I’m a fan of Highlander you can believe me. More than that, let me explain that I’m not just a fan of Highlander, it was, for a time, quite the obsession.

I happened upon the original 1986 Magnus Opus somewhere near HighSchool. I think, I THINK I was probably in Jr. High.

We had one Video Store in town at the time called Hastings, it was small (before the video market exploded and it moved to a bigger building) and Mama Schwarzenegger had taken me in there to pick out a video that I could watch with my siblings and some family friends that were over for the night.

Me picking out a video for the family always became a somewhat precarious situation as I opted for anything that bordered on the profane. There would come a point where I was pretty much barred from picking movies for the family, and if on the off chance I did, I found myself alone in the living room with no one to watch it with me (which IS and was fine by me).

So there it was, this strange cover showing Christopher Lambert brandishing a katana with the red words HIGHLANDER emblazoned on the top. I honestly don’t even remember turning to the back to see what it was about, I just handed it to my Mom who rented it for the night.

If you’ve never seen the movie I pity and envy you at the same time. Pity because you are missing out on a true original, fun, sci fi, adventure movie. Envy because you get to go out and see it for the first time!

I sat down in the living room and the movie starts, my brother, family friends around our age, huddled around the flickering joyscreen. The red letters of the opening monologue show up and Sean Connery’s rough scottish voice begins to speak

followed by the crashing sound of Queen and then the strange visuals of us in Madison Square Garden watching a wrestling match.

At this point we are all looking at each other, and me getting the most quizzical of glances, thinking “What is this?!”

Then…then…it just takes a turn and this movie unwinds like a everylasting gobstopper, becoming better and better as you reach it’s end.

It’s essentially, for those uninitiated, a film about a man who discovers that he’s an immortal. He can sense when other immortals are near and they must battle it out until the time of the Gathering in which the sole survivor gains the “prize”. I know, he’s immortal, how does one battle it out with an immortal?

By chopping off their head! As a kid, this was the coolest, craziest thing. You chopped off the immortal’s head, they were dead, for good (until the sequel hah) and then electricity would start moving around and the immortal that won the duel would get the “quickening” the power of the immortal they just killed. CRAZY AND GLORIOUS PEOPLE!

I was mesmerized.

I remembered two thoughts echoing through my brain - ONE) I need a trenchcoat. and TWO) I need a sword.

After the movie, banking on the large cult status the film generated, the producers of the film decided on a sequel (which at the time was the most high budgeted film ever)

Then another sequel (blah)

A Tv Show (it had it’s moments)

Another movie trying to incorporate the character from the first movie “Connor McCleod” with his TV Show cousin “Duncan McCleod”

Horrible.

I liked what they were trying to do, and though Christopher Lambert (Connor) was growing old by leaps and bounds and Adrian Paul (Duncan) continued to look young, it was stupid. The best they could have done was ignore the first movie completely as it negates the outcome of the TV show with us being shown that Connor was the one that WINS. But alas they want to keep the franchise alive so they tried to meld the two while changing the ending of the first movie. Lame

Which leads us to the latest offering in the live action Highlander series. Highlander the Source

OH HEAVEN’S TO BETSY THIS WAS BAD.

It’s the not to distant future. The world is crap (which means cheap to film in eastern Europe). Duncan McCleod is still around but he’s jaded (grrrr) and his latest love has left him because she wants kids (Immortals can’t have kids you see). Plus she is starting to get these visions about a “Source”, which is supposed to be where the Immortals powers and reason for being comes from.

So the bad guy de jur of this film is some bondage buff guy who looks more like he needs to be placed in a hellraiser movie than a Highlander one. He moves super fast, but looks incredibly dumb when he does so, and sings lyrics from the Queen Highlander soundtrack while he goes around killing immortals.

Weirdly some of the other Immortals from the Tv show get together to try and track down the source and enlist Duncan to help, reluctantly.

First off, the camera work, lighting, etc is great. There is a real moody otherworldly feeling going on here…BUT, looking good does not make a great movie, nor does it necessarily make a good one.

The movie moves from one set piece to another, very little explanation is given. Duncan has very little emotion about what’s going on other than chasing down his ex, who left him for kids, though now has visions about the “source”, what a coincidence eh?

And for a movie about swordfighting this is probably one of the worst action choreographed films I’ve ever seen. They think it’s cool to put things in fast forward and it just looks dumb. There is even a portion at the end where Duncan faces off in a climatic battle against the “Guardian” and moves around him like the Flash causing him to drill into the ground up to his shoulders…REALLY?

Ugh. Don’t see this movie. It’s a blight on humanity.

I’ve often thought about what I’d want to do if I had the chance to do a Highlander sequel and jacking up continuity within the series isn’t a part of it.

So, if you are new to the world do yourself a favor rent the first one and then stop, it’ll save you heartache, time and mental energy.

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